Magical German Chocolate Raspberry Cupcake Gems!

This just seems like one of the most appropriate things to include in a blog about a skinny girl who loves all things unhealthy and fat. My dogs make me happy and then… well then there’s food. Somewhere after dogs are boots, flannel, bloody marys, bacon and Chris D’Elia (getting a little off track…). Right now I’m really not loving the cupcake hipster train though. There are those of us who loved old fashioned fatty cupcakes before they were cool and colorful, and before there were chic ‘cupcake shops’ on every corner.

These cupcakes….are delish. The bomb. It’s like little magical fairies sprinkled love dust on your taste buds. So far I’ve eaten four. My mom’s recipe makes a dozen, so I suggest you triple it. I will say, I lucked out huge here in every way possible. I’m not a very good baker, I get frustrated easily when the icing doesn’t look Martha Stewart beautiful and when my cake is more like cardboard than sponge-like consistency. I could probably never ever do this again. I will probably never ever do this again. This was attempt 3 and now I’m sick of baking. 

1/4 cup coffee (suggest Chocolate Glazed Donut by Donut Shop, or don’t bother making them)
1/4 cup heavy cream
1/2 cup unsalted butter
1/4 cup 100% dark cocoa powder (I use Navita’s Naturals from Trader Joe’s)
1/2 tsp vanilla extract
1 cup flour
1 cup sugar
3/4 tsp baking soda
1/2 tsp salt
1 egg
1/3 cup sour cream
Vanilla Buttercream Ingredients (so yum)
1/2 cup unsalted butter
2 tbsp cream cheese (whipped is best)
1 lb (YES, 1 lb) powdered sugar
1/4 cup heavy cream
1/2 tbsp vanilla extract
dash of salt
Raspberry Curd Ingredients
1/2 stick unsalted butter
1 1/4 cup fresh raspberries (you can use frozen but don’t)
3 medium egg yolks, lightly beaten
1/3 cup sugar
1/4 tsp salt
1 tbsp fresh lemon juice
  1. Melt butter over medium heat, add raspberries, egg yolks, sugar & salt. Stir constantly until sugar is dissolved and berries have broken down. Cook at low simmer for about 10 minutes until sugar has dissolved. If you’re impatient like me this will seem like forever, but DON’T skimp on time…you will fuck it up.
  2. Stir in the fresh lemon juice and sift mixture through a large strainer (or medium, or small, or whatever), and allow to cool. As the mixture cools it will get thicker and then it will be even more awesome.
  3. Preheat the oven to 350 & line cupcake pan with liners (if they’re adorable and from Williams Sonoma I’ll dole out bonus points). Melt the butter over med-low & whisk in the cocoa powder until smooth. Add heavy cream, brewed coffee & vanilla extract. Heat until barely simmering. Remove from heat and let cool (i stuck in the freezer for 10 mins).
  4. Whisk together flour, sugar, baking soda and salt. In a separate bowl, whisk together sour cream and eggs.
  5. Slowly pour the chocolate mixture into the egg/sour cream mixture and whisk until smooth. It will be hard but don’t eat the fucking batter. This is the only recipe in the history of recipes where the cupcakes are literally better than the batter.
  6. Make a well in the middle of the flour mixture. Slowly fold the chocolate mix into the flour. Whisk batter about 20 strokes & fill cupcake liners 3/4 full with batter. Bake 17-19 minutes; you are basically an idiot if you can’t tell when cupcakes are done  but let cool in the pan for 5 minutes before removing to a wire rack.
  7. Buttercream Frosting: mix together butter and cream cheese. Add sugar one cup at a time and mix. Last add the vanilla extract, dash of salt and heavy cream. If you don’t turn your mixer on high here you will ruin the entire fucking recipe; now isn’t the time to get lazy. You are so close to edible perfection.
  8. Assembly: Core out the center of each cupcake using an apple corer (teaspoon works too if your kitchen tools aren’t amaze like mine) and spoon in the raspberry curd filling. Pipe frosting onto the tops of cupcakes.

EDIT: I use the Nordic Ware Ultimate Decorating tool for frosting which is PHENOMENAL, it requires virtually no effort from me (find it here: Nordic Ware Ultimate Decorating Tool). Also, I added 1tbsp of raspberry curd to buttercream frosting for look which, I guess, actually makes me a cupcake hipster. Motherfuck. Then I topped these gems which Gihardelli chocolate squares, as if they needed that.

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